Fffft!

I don't know what's wrong with me.

I think I need to disappear for a while. When it all starts to make no sense, and I can't seem to talk even to myself, I feel like this.



When will the rains come?

DEPLOYED!

The writing for today has officially been destroyed.
In it's place, I have an advertisement for someone who needs a job.

Talkin' about time

How many people have attempted to talk about time? It’s been compared to all manners of liquids, from mercury, blood, water. It’s been compared to solids like sand, forces of nature like wind… but no discussion of this abstract has come close to Einstein’s Dreams by Alan Lightman.
Pick it up.

Wanking, but good wanking.

Not sure why that popped into my head all of a sudden, but it did.

And the heat doesn’t break. The lows tonight in the city will be in the 80’s. I’m staying with a friend b/c the a/c in my place just won’t cut it, and I hope everyone else is able to find a way to keep cool tonight.

I can’t think tonight. I’m trying to get more examples up tonight so that I can get this job. I need it, and I want it too. It would be the solution to a lot of problems that I’m having currently.
And then there’s that apartment I saw. Oh, if I were able, I’d be out of this one so fast and down within 500 feet of the lake and the beach, on a dead end road, parking space in the back, front porch for me to sit on and play to the night air.

All the romantic little nothings that taunt me. I just wake up and I’m still myself. Gradually becoming more overweight, apathetic, and broke. Perhaps I’ve created this pattern, maybe not, but I’m trying to break it.

Just am not sure where to go with everything, and nothing is falling into place.

Whoever is out there, please help me out with just a thought or a prayer that I can get this damn job and be on my way.

Much love to those who are with me :) I wouldn’t be without you…

I’ve been spending those imaginary lottery winnings in my head for some time now. It is a reality that I think I could live with should it come my way.
The crunch is on. There’s a job I want, and have a chance at, and I’m down to the wire.
My friend came from NY earlier this week, and it’s surprising the mixture of conflict and peace that is left behind when anyone leaves your home.
I’m left standing in the hallway, the lights off and the only sounds are the occasional cars, voices from outside the windows, and the settling of the apartment in the evening. And these thoughts of discussions, and the silences that often followed.
I still wonder… I still have the ability to do many things.
I don’t need sympathy. I don’t need blinders. There’s something outside the window, whispers and reminders. I’m waiting for the call, I’m waiting for the call, I can't sit still at all. When will it come?

Hi guys....

Weird weather here these days... grey skies and dust all around. Makes me wonder...

The weather person says it's supposed to be 78 outside, but I know he'slying, the humidity makes me feel every degree.

How are you guys?

I spent all morning at Kelly services and then at city staffing. The firstencounter was amiable but something equivalent to a brush off. If there'swork that matches my skills, they'll call. I joked saying it was o.k. if Ilowballed and they gave me work that went below my skill levels, I didn't mind.

I applied for four different jobs. I looked at my bank account. I went toblockbuster and applied there for a management position, and told them to hire me for anything anyway.
The guy said they'd call.

I dreamt about Woodie's guitar, and I wonder where it is now. Has anyonetried playing it recently?

I put some of my work and reference stuff on a website in the hopes ofadding something to my resume. I'm going to work on another website soon.

There's coffee in the kitchen, and there aren't any cups in the sink, foronce.

I'm going out to sell some of my recording equipment, and some of my CD's.I think besides the guitars that's all I really own that can get some money.

I feel dum-buh. (That's dumb with a 'b'.)

Maybe it's just the grey skies, and the humidity.
Is there anyone out there reading this stuff?

So tonight is the big night.I’ve waited to drop this on the page, but back in the beginning of June, I was selected to participate in a recording project put up by one of the places I perform at. There are 20 people selected and each person gets a track on their CD, which I thought to be a very cool prize. Better than just getting some cash collected from a tip jar….
Ah, but then reality sort of settled in. Granted, this is still a great opportunity, but things never quite work out the way you planned.

Went off to the studio and it was still melty hot… like velveeta humid, baby. It was in this old storefront that had been reconstructed to be what is called a ‘dead room’, meaning that sound was even and also very quiet from street noise.

Well, as most recordings go, you have to lay down separate tracks for stuff. There are 2 stereo tracks for the acoustic guitar, and then the vocals. I’d been agonizing over whether or not to perform an instrumental or a piece with vocals… and opted for the second part.

Whoops.

I’m not the greatest singer to begin with, but add some dehydration, and singing the same lines over and over… well, you can get the picture. It’s tiring (even for the writer) to hear a short piece of music over and over. It’s not just a physical feeling in the ears, but also just a sort of fatigue to the music. Don’t get me wrong, I actually like this song, but this is one of the major reasons people don’t record vocals on the same day they do the music tracks.

Hmm… I just don’t like it being out of my hands. I only got to hear a rough rough mix after it was all done (took a bit over an hour altogether including mic placement, and a quick overdub on some parts…) and it just didn’t sound like me.

But we’ll see once it’s really mixed and mastered.

I am still really excited to be on this project, though. :) And I can’t wait until it’s released… I’ll keep everyone posted…